Guest Post: Sir Reg Futtock on Brexit Day 1

We’re delighted that Sir Reginald Futtock has taken time off from his busy schedule planning Britain’s post-Brexit economic miracle to share his thoughts in the first of a series of guest posts…

So, Day 1: and though I claim only part of the credit, so far so good. Yes, a few fly-by-night, here-today-and-gone-tomorrow outfits such as Lloyds of London have announced plans to shift jobs to the continent. But balance that against today’s spontaneous outpouring of national joy as we British throw off the oppressive yoke of the Brussels Eurocrats.

Brexit march

A typical scene of British people expressing their hatred of the EU. (Credit: Ed Everett)

Yes, there will be sacrifices. With the devaluation of the Pound, a decent bottle of Chateau Lafite Rothschild now costs well over £1,000. No doubt you will have noticed similar price rises in your own weekly shop.

But be reassured: the hard work of building the economic miracle continues. My Brexit Advisory Committee is looking at a range of soft, hard and harder-still options, of which ‘Eye-watering Brexit’ is the current favourite. In this scenario, we’ll have to replace up to £230 billion of annual exports to the EU. That’s a lot of boxes of speciality tea and pots of damson jam we’re going to have to shift to the rest of the world over the next few years. But it can be done.

It reminds me of my time at British Leyland. For all the sneering and jeering about the Austin Allegro by elitists such as my old friend and fellow embroidery enthusiast Jeremy Clarkson, we sold over 600,000 of them. (Almost entirely in Britain, as it happens, but that’s a detail.) With the right products, the right spirit and a large dose of tax breaks for the country’s wealth creators, we can Make Brexit Work!

And if you can’t wait for my book to come out in August to discover how you too can benefit financially from Brexit, then look out for my next guest post.

 

 

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Mr Brexit: the Man with the Plan

Screen Shot 2017-03-28 at 15.00.38We’ve heard a lot about Britain’s destiny as a Global Powerhouse outside the European Union – but not so much detail on exactly how this will happen. So in the week that Article 50 is triggered, IndieBooks is proud to announce a new book that maps out Britain’s glittering economic future. And who better to pen it that Sir Reg Futtock, the Prime Minister’s newly-appointed advisor on Post-Brexit Prosperity.

For fifty years, Sir Reginald’s career has been synonymous with British business: from launching the world-beating Austin Allegro to taking RBS up to and beyond the pinnacle of international banking. Now he is bringing this wealth of experience to helping Britain plan for success in the post-Brexit world.

In Mr Brexit: the Man with the Plan, Sir Reg will set out why we joined, why we left and who will be the winners and losers as Britain returns to Splendid Isolation. This book is not clogged up with facts and evidence: instead, Sir Reg uses his own experiences, from sacking 31,000 staff at Marconi to bribing members of the Saudi Royal family, to explain how Brexit can achieve its essential purpose: ensuring that Britain’s wealth-creators remain in charge.

Although Sir Reg has a busy schedule caddying for Don Trump and grovelling to a range of foreign despots, he has promised us the book will be ready for publication in August.