Sir Reg: “Britain Backs Brexit”

Sir Reginald Futtock, the chair of the Government’s Brexit Advisory Committee and author of “Mr Brexit – the Man with the Plan” (out this September) has asked us to allow him to offer some reassurance to the country at this time of National Confusion.

I’ve been watching the results of the election from my villa in Cancun and feel the time has come to silence some of the more excitable speculation about our plans for Brexit.

Take it from me, this election has been a triumph for Brexit. After all, when you add up all the parties who back leaving the EU, it comes to over 600 MPs. The pro-EU parties have lost seats like a BA computer!

It’s hardly surprising. After all, we’ve been saying how Brexit will liberate our country and bring unparalleled prosperity (for the Few, and perhaps even some of the Many, though that doesn’t matter so much). Fortunately the People had a choice between one leader who was lukewarm for Remaining but has converted to Leaving; and another leader who has believed in Leaving since 1973.

And now the People have spoken, they can clear off again while we get back to the serious business of negotiating our way out of the European octopus and into the arms of the Chinese.

Jiānqiáng wěndìng

 

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Guest Post: Sir Reg Futtock on Brexit Day 1

We’re delighted that Sir Reginald Futtock has taken time off from his busy schedule planning Britain’s post-Brexit economic miracle to share his thoughts in the first of a series of guest posts…

So, Day 1: and though I claim only part of the credit, so far so good. Yes, a few fly-by-night, here-today-and-gone-tomorrow outfits such as Lloyds of London have announced plans to shift jobs to the continent. But balance that against today’s spontaneous outpouring of national joy as we British throw off the oppressive yoke of the Brussels Eurocrats.

Brexit march

A typical scene of British people expressing their hatred of the EU. (Credit: Ed Everett)

Yes, there will be sacrifices. With the devaluation of the Pound, a decent bottle of Chateau Lafite Rothschild now costs well over £1,000. No doubt you will have noticed similar price rises in your own weekly shop.

But be reassured: the hard work of building the economic miracle continues. My Brexit Advisory Committee is looking at a range of soft, hard and harder-still options, of which ‘Eye-watering Brexit’ is the current favourite. In this scenario, we’ll have to replace up to £230 billion of annual exports to the EU. That’s a lot of boxes of speciality tea and pots of damson jam we’re going to have to shift to the rest of the world over the next few years. But it can be done.

It reminds me of my time at British Leyland. For all the sneering and jeering about the Austin Allegro by elitists such as my old friend and fellow embroidery enthusiast Jeremy Clarkson, we sold over 600,000 of them. (Almost entirely in Britain, as it happens, but that’s a detail.) With the right products, the right spirit and a large dose of tax breaks for the country’s wealth creators, we can Make Brexit Work!

And if you can’t wait for my book to come out in August to discover how you too can benefit financially from Brexit, then look out for my next guest post.

 

 

Mr Brexit: the Man with the Plan

Screen Shot 2017-03-28 at 15.00.38We’ve heard a lot about Britain’s destiny as a Global Powerhouse outside the European Union – but not so much detail on exactly how this will happen. So in the week that Article 50 is triggered, IndieBooks is proud to announce a new book that maps out Britain’s glittering economic future. And who better to pen it that Sir Reg Futtock, the Prime Minister’s newly-appointed advisor on Post-Brexit Prosperity.

For fifty years, Sir Reginald’s career has been synonymous with British business: from launching the world-beating Austin Allegro to taking RBS up to and beyond the pinnacle of international banking. Now he is bringing this wealth of experience to helping Britain plan for success in the post-Brexit world.

In Mr Brexit: the Man with the Plan, Sir Reg will set out why we joined, why we left and who will be the winners and losers as Britain returns to Splendid Isolation. This book is not clogged up with facts and evidence: instead, Sir Reg uses his own experiences, from sacking 31,000 staff at Marconi to bribing members of the Saudi Royal family, to explain how Brexit can achieve its essential purpose: ensuring that Britain’s wealth-creators remain in charge.

Although Sir Reg has a busy schedule caddying for Don Trump and grovelling to a range of foreign despots, he has promised us the book will be ready for publication in August.